Coercive Control: He Hit Me… (& It Felt Like A Kiss)

While true crime is enjoying something of a spike in popularity, let’s not treat it like a recently discovered, previously untapped mine of compulsive entertainment.  People have been getting their kicks from vivid descriptions of gory violence and proximity to psychopathy since the true crime section sprang up in WH Smiths.

I know. I was there.

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Tampon Wars: A Bloody Embarrassment

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Stereotypes tell me that at least 50% of you are going to recoil from this post because of the title. Because you’re men and have a genetic condition that renders you incapable of seeing the word tampon without having a panic attack, let alone stride confidently through the aisles of the supermarket grasping the box of Tampax Super your other half requested.

I choose not to believe in stereotypes. They’re a luxury from a bygone age, when we didn’t use them to obfuscate and externalise our responsibilities.

You’re better than that.

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Mental Health: Weak

I suppose it would be odd if I didn’t write something about depression in Mental Health Week. But ironically, I’m currently depressed, and more ironically still, unlike all the artists I love and admire, I’m not inspired to greatness by suspension in my own misery.

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The Sergio Ramos Set-Off Theory

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Twitter is a weird place.

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Laura Jane Grace: Transitional Faze

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I’ve never been particularly comfortable with Caitlyn Jenner’s transition.

That bothered me.

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Shane Sutton: Marginal gains

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By resigning from his position as technical director of British cycling, Shane Sutton has instantly become the poster boy for those who believe that women aren’t capable of coping with the rigorous, often unpleasant realities of competing in elite sport.

Phone-ins and social media networks are alight with righteous indignation propelled voices claiming that if women can’t stand the intensity of the motivational tactics (which may or may not include verbal sparring and insults) required, perhaps they should reacquaint themselves with the more suitable challenges of the kitchenette.

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This is not for you.

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Toby Young, Daily Mail 1st April 2016.

You could say that drawing attention to this sort of thing is giving the trolls what they want.

That Toby Young will be reclining on his chaise longue this morning, clad in smoking jacket and dragging on the big old Cuban parked between his educated lips while he cackles at the outrage his Daily Mail article provoked.

Rod Liddle will be sitting alongside him.

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I’ll tell you what’s on my effing mind…

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It’s a great leveller, social media, isn’t it?

In olden times, before Facebook and Twitter were things, we had no portal to air our feelings on matters that we had no prior knowledge of, so we limited our explosive rants to subjects we were vaguely qualified on or just made a massive fool of ourselves down the pub.

At least then we kept our friends entertained.

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Blurred Lines: “I know you want it.”

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When news broke that Sunderland and England footballer Adam Johnson had been arrested on suspicion of sexual activity with an underage girl, the accelerated judicial procedure that is social media reached a verdict within seconds.

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Coming over here, stealing all our advertising space…

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Is everyone clear now?

Although I have to say, Zakia, if you’re going to insist on using words like ‘pluralism’, ‘multitude’, ‘condemn’ and ‘hear’, you’re almost certainly going to confuse your target demographic.

Anyone with half a brain has, after all, worked this out for themselves.