#Trumpjacking: A Users Guide

trump
Donald Trump posts something self-aggrandising on Twitter.

Photoshop that tweet in as juvenile a manner you like until he looks as bovine as his politics.

Post the results on Twitter.

Congratulations! You have #TrumpJacked.

Gullnado: Beyond The Wit Of Man

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If you want to illustrate your inflammatory article about how seagulls are terrorising innocent holidaymakers on British beaches, Getty have helpfully put together a package of photographs for you to do so.

Equally, you can make a storyboard for a classic (bloody awful) creature feature called Gullnado. It’s more or less the same thing, of course, but at least with the latter you don’t have to play down the role that people’s inability to to deal with their food waste has on their behaviour.

You can make a plot point of it.

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EA Sports: It’s not what it looks like

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Oh, please.

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UK Politics: In Profile

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White? Middle class? Worried about the impact of diversity in the UK?

Fearful that British culture is being diluted by immigration?

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Dominique Strauss-Kahn: Pressing the flesh

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According to evidence given by sex workers at his trial, it could be suggested that this kind of thing seems to happen quite regularly in the vicinity of Dominique Strauss-Kahn.

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Neat point, well made, FEMEN.

 

 

Mike Read: “Suitable for every situation”

 

According to the Big M Promotions website, Mike Read “has the ability to receive the admiring attention of everyone in a room and he always has the crowd in awe at his vocal velocity and clever repartee suitable for every situation“.

I’ll let you be the judge of that.

Introducing: The HoverRef

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This installation at the British Museum has given me an idea for EURO 2016.

By suspending the referee above the pitch in some sort of harnessy thing, we’d not only be allowing him a bird’s eye view of every single incident (resulting in better officiating), but the opportunities for mayhem and disaster would be increased ten fold.

We could even offer five minutes in charge of the referee’s harness controls as some sort of ITV prize.

Everyone’s a winner!